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Sunday, December 31, 2006

 

From Another Incipient Golf Blogger

Mr Science found this PreBloggingEra missive in his Email Archives, from a friend back East . . . it's possible, I suppose, that this is the course he's talking about . . . where Mr Science was a member . . .

Oh, the tragedy!

As I mentioned in my last issue I played golf on Friday and a worse display of humiliation that course has never seen. It started off positively enough. The first hole is across a water hazard, which is always a little intimidating, but I made a beautiful drive to green it on the very first stroke. And then by some divine intervention I managed to sink the ball in two putts for par.
Unfortunately, that kind of luck wasn't going to stick with me. On the second tee I sliced one ball onto the neighboring fairway and another completely off the course into a cornfield (I hope it doesn't end up in a can of creamed corn somewhere). And things got worse from there.
By the end of the day I had burned through three balls, got asked to play through twice and received one warning from the golf cop for wading into a water hazard up to my knees. I'm not even going to tell you what I scored. It's enough to make a person want to take an acetylene torch to every single one of his clubs. I'd like to kick the Scotsman who invented this game right in the shins.
Ah, well...I'm sure I'll do better next Friday.
By the by, this famous movie quote... "Do you want your driver?" "No thanks, he's not my type," is dialog between Rodney Dangerfield and his caddy in the movie
Caddy Shack.
Laugh it up

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